I want out.

I haven't had SUCH a f***ed up school-related thing in a while. IT is piss so i really don't know why i'm still studying it. My CP called my dad this afternoon and said my results were 'not too good lah'. I KNOW. i can tell him myself.

and the worst thing was that my dad sounded more disappointed than pissed.

it's not like i didn't study. i did. but truthfully, there's really only -THIS- much i can absorb. you tell me if you can learn something you're totally not interested in. !@#$%^&*&^%$#@!@#$%^&* it.

so there'll be a parent-teacher thing (oh, for the LOVE of god, i thought i escaped this kind of shit when i left secondary school) this friday and my mom and dad want to go. i hate this feeling. i hate being forced to do something i KNOW i'll never be good at.

i'm short of breath and am breathing so hard now. i don't know why.

would you believe me if i told you i didn't utter a SINGLE word at dinner with my parents just now? not even ONE word. that was how disturbed i was by this entire school thing. STILL disturbed actually.

i need a cold shower and i need it now.

p.s. sorry for unleashing the bitch.