Sunday

is anyone feeling as bored as I am right now?

but of course you are, you're here! =D

HAPPY SUNDAY!


!edit

KUALA LUMPUR (AFP) - A Malaysian welder had to have a nut removed from around his penis after an attempt to lengthen it before he gets engaged next week went embarrassingly wrong, a news report said Sunday.


The nut got stuck on his penis following an erection, the Star newspaper said, forcing him to seek help at a hospital in southern Johor state.

Staff from the Sultanah Aminah hospital had to drain some blood from the penis and cut away a top layer of skin before the object could be removed, the newspaper said.

It said the fire and rescue department were also involved in trying to remove the nut from the unnamed welder, who is in his 20s and hoped the nut would weigh down his penis to make it longer.

"The patient is now recovering and we hope to discharge him today (Sunday)," hospital director Daud Abdul Rahim told the Star.

On August 25, another young man in Kuala Lumpur had tried to increase his sexual prowess by slipping a steel ring around his penis, forcing the fire department to cut off the ring after doctors were unable to remove it, the newspaper said.



you gotta love stupidity like this baby.

Day 1 of Fall Semester'08

my teacher for COM317 class (intro. to business and professional comm.) told each group to write a 'speech'. it can be in chronological order/complex to simple/known to unknown etc etc. stuff like that. so our group decided to fool around with 'chronological order' and this was what we came up with:

How to kill a chicken for consumption.

First, set up a freedom restricting device (FRD) using some tantalizing chicken feed ala worm. Next, await the grand arrival and consumption of feed ala worm by chicken. This crucial step will activate the freedom restricting device (FRD), which will restrict the freedom of the chicken.

Then, we will slowly and carefully lift up the FRD with the non-master hand, and we will reach in with our master hand to apply a vice-like grip to the chicken's walking apparatus (WA).

Adjust and enhance to a comfortable yet firm grip. Using your non-master hand, apply another vice-like grip to the other WA. Take note that the above process should be completed within the shortest possible time, because failure to do so will result in the repetition of the whole process and the unfavourable freedom of the chicken.

Next, transfer your master hand to the head supporting apparatus (HSA) of the chicken with your thumb perpendicular to the ground, and parallel to the force of gravity.

Give the HSA a firm and abrupt clockwise (or counter clockwise) twist, and lift the brain containment unit (BCU) off the HSA housing. Tilt the organ-containment unit (OCU) in the angle of 45.8 degrees to facilitate the excretion of red oxygen carrying fluids.

With a sharpened tool, slit from under the solar plexus all the way down to the waste excretion opening. Empty contents.

Slowly but surely, lower the carcass of the chicken into a pot made of steel, containing liquid made up of two parts hydrogen and one part oxygen at a boiling temperature of one degree above ninety-nine degrees.

Remove temperature preservation coating (aka feathers) to expose the porous flesh covering. Finally, consume.

it's nonsense like these that make school cool. =D

Engrish.com

this website is a perfect way to waste your time. but at least you laugh while doing that.

how much caffeine is in their coffee?






haha i was at the website trying to take my mind off school which starts IN EXACTLY EIGHT HOURS AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Taking violence to a whole new level

apart from synchronized swimming being the main highlight of the olympics for me, this was pretty darn amusing too:



"Cuba's Angel Matos and his coach were banned for life after Matos kicked the referee in the head following his bronze-medal match disqualification."

oh and:




HAHAHAHAHA

Thursday

first of all, to germy, tingting, jiajia and sarah: you guys are wonderful friends. =) thanks for waiting with me today. and special thanks to alvin fatty tham (*radio dedication) for accompanying me on the drive home. =D =D =D

anyway, i felt prissy today so i chickened out of paint ball. and a good thing too, since most (especially kev) were bruised pretty badly. the wounds were so bad they looked like shingles. EW. but i still had fun watching from the sidelines with kerri and joel. great fun.

the bbq was going pretty fine and dandy until the stupid security guards at the gardens @ bishan condo rained on our parade. 'eh sorry, der resident not here you kannot barbecue. you have to pack up by 8.30 and leave.' excuse me you already called the resident and she gave authorization why can't you bloody close one eye? we had to move the party to kerri's but i had to leave cos it'll be so late by the time i got home. so yeah, jonno i'm sorry and happy birthday haha!

i smell of rain water, smoke and sweat. shower, please.

P.S. YAY MY VICTORIA SECRET JEANS HAVE ARRIVED AND I'M VERY PLEASED.

Random-pictures post

everytime i go out i take pictures of ridiculous and/or hilarious stuff if i happen to come across any. so i thought i'd share these few. i have many more but i have to find them:


dr henry ho can clean the top row of your teeth and remove your bottom jaw.


and this is just some cute, fat cat in a pet shop at holland v pressing its face against the cage. i thought it was so cute that its doing that. isnt it so cute?


what every lego packaging needs - a creepy old man playing with its contents.


my sister works in aviva and they had some event that had cheerleading (like wth, i know). i took this off the aviva magazine and it required a lot of effort cos i couldnt stop laughing. look at where the guy's hands are.

i have one picture of a guy in weird, tight, tablecloth looking pants that i cannot find. but for now... hahahaha.

Waste.

over the course of 5 days, i've done some pretty stupid things.

you know what? that was a severe understatement.

but i've managed to 'reverse' the process. sort of... it's a VERY stupid thing i did. so stupid that i dont even wanna say it here. haha. too mind-numbingly embarrassing.

anyway, school'll commence in about a week and i've not even gotten my books. oh and it turns out that crazy professor gave me a B for persuasion so i guess he's not THAT crazy after all. but the fact remains that it takes 95% to get an A in his class so he is still crazy. i need to expand my vocabulary.

i'm quite successful at sticking to my current resolution of not driving my car until school starts. i wanna save money and the Earth. i've been restraining myself when i go out too - there are so many things that i want but didn't buy, so many pricey places that i wanna eat at but didn't. ALL BECAUSE OF THE STUPID THING THAT I DID.

so bored. i'm about to fall asleep but i haven't showered.

Good day, sunlight.

Jason Mraz - Who Needs Shelter


i have this sudden thing for Jason Mraz.

XOXO

ok so i'v moved on to a new chick-tv series. my One Tree Hill season 5 is taking too long to be released on dvd.

enter Gossip Girl.

lykohmagawshright.

my guilty pleasure. yes now you all know. i love high school-ish, teenage drama type shows.

and you know what... i might just be having a celebrity crush on Blake Lively.

180

so it turns out that the tickets to fly to aussie right now cost a bomb. a very nuclear sized bomb, thanks to airport tax, which is about $600 per person. that's just the airport tax alone! LIKEWTHZOMG.

so we've booked a trip to Hokkaido instead. i'm as thrilled as the last time my parents decided to go to Japan... which is not so. cos i had my heart set in fishing in aussie and driving down the Great Ocean Road (i love the ocean =D). i love aussie in all it's glorious nature... whatever the hell that means.

but having said that, i must tell you that i enjoyed myself a lot the last time i went to Japan; no regrets. i'm guessing this time'll be the same? or maybe even better since it'll be winter and all Singaporeans love snow (well we should!). plus, i get to wear stuff that i'd normally wouldnt wear in Singapore, which is cool cos i'm vain, oh-so very vain. the best snowing encounter i've had was in Whistler, Canada. cos it was near christmas and people were being merry and handing out candy. and it's was SNOWING. like magic.

my flight's on dec 6. yes still a pretty long way away but i actually can't wait to see scenes like these:




so i'm gonna be bringing Diana.



no.




darling alvin gave me this darling camera for our 2yr anniversary and i'm PSYCHED to test it out in Japan.

hey looks like i'm excited to go to Japan after all! YAY!